New Home Buyer Tips: Assessing potential velociraptor attacks


Liz Jenkins


Thanks to @timTech & @PaymanBenz on Twitter for this terrific resource for new home buyers. The potential of velociraptor attacks is not generally known.  For your own protection and those of your buyers, please read the following information:

The main information for new home buyers is below, although more detailed information about velicoraptors is on the site. 

New Home Buyer Tips from

When buying a new home, there are a few things to look out for when assessing potential velociraptor attacks:

  1. Check all doors and windows. Doors should be made of solid oak or steel. Windows should have steel bars with spacing smaller than the average raptor.
  2. Make sure all entryways have adequate deadbolts. Quality deadbolts may be purchased at your local Home Depot.
  3. Always keep a loaded big-game rifle under your bed, and tire irons near every door. Remember, you should never be farther than 20 feet away from a tire iron.